Not the news we were waiting for...

Ted likes to be "prepared" for trouble -- meaning, not have it take him by suprise. It's the funniest when we're watching a movie, and he wants to identify the "sacrificial lamb" right away, so he's not too disappointed when his favorite character gets shot up by unethical gangsters halfway through. In our personal life, this means expecting the worst all the time, and then being pleasantly suprised when anything good happens. And lately, this has been a good policy, as we've suffered a number of significant work-related disappointments. However, it's still really, really disappointing.

From the very beginning of this process to adopt Anastasia, we have been very cautious with our emotions. We've tried really hard to say "if" instead of "when" while still faithfully planning for her and doing what needed to be done to make it happen. I think it was about March 26 though, when we hosted KluckStock and were so blown away by the support of our friends and family, and recieved such a significant portion of our financial needs, that we started to let our guard down. For one thing, the things to be done for the adoption were beginning to ratchet up -- I've been spending about half of my week on fundraising and adoption-related tasks. One of the big emotional barriers we had put up was that there were going to be no physical, tangible evidences of a girl coming to live here. Several people have offered me girl clothes (one of the things I've most anticipated) and I've always said -- not yet. But yesterday morning, I was down in the basement sorting through stuff for the garage sale, including some stuff my sister had given me that my nieces had outgrown. And there were a few little dresses that came out of the garage sale pile, that I took upstairs and showed Ted, and said this we'll save for our daughter! I joyfully hung those dresses in the closet of our extra bedroom, to wait for her. The guards are down, we're all in.

It wasn't more than an hour later that my social worker called, with the very bad news. A Ukrainian family has seen Anastasia (this was not legal) and has visited her (also not legal) and has filed for adoption of her (not. legal. according to what we had been PROMISED by our agency.) The director of the orphanage where she lives told this family that she is spoken for, but they did not care, and have gone forward with trying to adopt her. Now, if it's not legal, you might ask, how can they do it? This is Ukraine, where money and influence talk (and they clearly have both, or they wouldn't have gotten this far), not America, where people who take bribes get in trouble. We should have known this could happen, but we were too busy trusting our agency, believing in a flimsy "legal document" that we signed a year ago, and waiting to make our move (at our agency's instruction.) Our agency's initial response was, we're sorry, there's nothing we can do.

The distressing thing in all of this is that we have absolutely no recourse, except through our agency. And while they are sympathetic, and willing to "ask questions," time is passing, and this other family is DOING something -- they are adopting our child! And we are waiting, waiting, waiting, totally unsure of what will happen. If we do nothing, for sure she is gone. If we move heaven and earth (not even sure how we would do that) she might be gone anyway. Unless God intervenes, it looks very very bleak.

So would you join us in praying for justice? That our agency would ACT on our behalf (we have already paid them a lot of money to be our advocates.) That we would hear back from Dr. D, the head of the agency on the Ukraine side (who is mysteriously "hard to reach" right now) who is the only one who can do anything. That we would be able to trust God in all of this, and carry on with our lives while we wait. That somehow, in this, we will be able to praise Him and see His Name honored.

And then practically -- about this horrible sale. I'm going to go forward with it, mainly because it's already in motion. If the bottom falls out, and we can't complete this adoption (I refuse to accept this yet -- I am prepared to fight this with everything in me) then I guess we'll talk about what happens to the money we raised at that time. It kinda takes the wind right out of our sails, and if you no longer want to donate your stuff, I understand. I am just trying, against all reason, to maintain a little hope as long as there is a chance.

I frequently get asked "how's the adoption going" or "what's new with the adoption?". It's cool to see how many people are interested in (and supportive of!!) our adoption progress, that's been very encouraging. What's frustrating, though, is how seldom I actually have any new or exciting news to share! However -- rest assured, that when I do -- YOU, faithful blog followers, will be the very first to know! And because I want to keep you all hooked to following the blog (partially to feed my pathetic ego -- but also so that when there is big news, people hear of it) I feel like I should post something at least weekly -- but I'm kind of at a loss of what to say this week, because literally, nothing has happened.

It was one of those weeks where I felt just absolutely wrung out, and run down. Busy every single minute it felt like, yet I'm a bit hard pressed to say exactly what it was I was so busy with. I did wrap up the latest session of Christianity Explored, so that was certainly a part of the week. For those of you who don't know what Christianity Explored is -- it's this really awesome event our church does (it was actually started by a church in London) where people who are curious about Christianity can come and eat a meal and discuss it in a non-threatening environment (they don't have to sing or pray or be able to find obscure verses in Habbakuk.) My role in this production has been to cook the meal each week -- and I've absolutely loved it! I was given free reign to plan the meals, get the ingredients, and gather a team of people to help me in the kitchen so we can have a meal for 40-50 people ready at 6:30 on Wednesdays. And I have to admit, I've spent a lot more time thinking about the food and hospitality part of it than about the content of the event, even though the content, not the food, is the part that's a big deal. But anyway, I've done this now for 3 or 4 sessions (10 week sessions) and it has really been a great chance to sort of try my hand at something I've always wanted to do, and it's gone pretty well. It also gave me a great chance to sort of refine some of my recipes, as well as plan out full menus (you know, what goes with what) which is really coming in handy as I work on my cookbook.

And I have been working on my book! It's been great fun -- I never realized I had so much to say about food! Originally, I thought it would just sort of be a collection of recipes, but it's grown to be much more than that, already. Each recipe, as I've entered in into the document, has a memory or association or at the very least some special instructions or ideas. So it's not just the recipe itself, but the story of that recipe. It's kind of become a no-holds-barred trip down memory lane, replete with all my personal opinions and dumb biases. Sort of a window into my soul, if you will. Some of the opinions are ugly -- yes, it's true. I share my deep hatred of such terrible things as loaf bread and cold cereal and don't even get me started on poor quality vanilla extract! -- that's right, I don't hold anything back. They don't call me the saucy broad for nothing!

I've also been working on this Family to Family sale thing. And by "working on" I mean thinking about and stressing out about it. I don't know anything about hosting sales! I don't know how to advertise stuff! I don't know how to get people to donate stuff! I definitely don't know how to organize a huge pile of stuff (hopefully) into a neatly categorized and labeled buying-frenzy-display! But -- I didn't know how to organize an awesome fundraising party, and that worked out, right? And I didn't think I would have enough recipes or opinions about food to write a cookbook, and it's going great! I really didn't think I could rally together the stamina to complete not one, not two, but three international adoptions. So surely I can do a sale too! Right? (this would be an appropriate time to give me a pep talk. yes, I am needy.)

But lest you think there is absolutely nothing new under the sun, allow me to intoduce you to an exciting new product put out by my publisher -- Gut Check Press. (did you catch that, kids? My publisher. That's right, I. Have. A. Publisher!!) This book, called Kinda Christianity is not only going to give you something to do while you wait for my book, it's going to keep you up at night laughing! So get yourself on over to Amazon, and buy the booky!

May 15

Hey Campers,

I'm sure you've all scurried over to the Gut Check Press site looked for my cookbook - and it'll be there soon! But in case you're just feeling overwhelmed with the yawning expanse of time between now and when you can get your grubby little paws on Saucy Broad, I've got something else for you to do.

I told you that I would be hosting a BIG SALE and that I would give you details soon, so here it is:

(Aside: Some of you may wonder why I'm not calling this a Mom 2 Mom sale anymore. It's because the phrase "Mom 2 Mom Sale" is officially trademarked, meaning that we would have to pay some hen a large amount of cashish to use it. Not worth it. Also a sign of the impending apocolypse, in my humble opinion. Anyway)

When: May 15, 2010 9am to 1pm

Where: URC Multipurpose Room

What: A huge smorgasboard of cool (slightly used) stuff you can buy and/or a great chance to clear out your closet/attic/basement/garage and donate your stuff to my sale! All proceeds will go towards the KluckAdoption Cause!

How: can you get involved? Easy!

1) Start cleaning, have your stuff ready to bring to URC on May 14 (if you want brownie points, get your friends and family to donate their extra stuff too) I'll take anything that would sell at a garage sale (kids stuff, furniture (ok, nothing too huge) household stuff -- you get the idea.)

2) Come up with a brilliant plan to advertise this event to the greater Lansing area, and then offer to DO the advertising so I can focus on "managing" the event. Maybe you can announce it via your facebook statuses, messages to friends, etc.

3) Come to URC on Friday May 14 and help me organize and price stuff. It sounds like work, but it will actually be SUPER fun.

4) Come to URC on Saturday May 15 to help me run the sale, OR to buy stuff, OR to help me clean up afterwards (and get the room ready for church on Sunday.) This will also be SUPER fun.

5)Think of(and make?) other cool things that could sell at this event: hair barettes, cookies, matchy mother/daughter apron sets, whatever!

I'm sure if I were the Pioneer Woman I would think of something sufficiently wry/self-deprecating (but still fabulous-sounding) and completely perfect to add here...something that would make you think "I need to try that" but REALLY make you think "I wish I WAS her!!" Which, I think, lies at the heart of the Pioneer Woman's appeal, and also drives her overwhelming ability to move product. However, if Ted and I have proven anything, it is that we are NOT cooler than you, and we are completely underwhelming in the area of moving product.

So what am I saying? To quote the timeless fount of wisdom that is Jerry Ma (bleepin') Guire. "Jump into our nightmare while the water's warm." Translation: If you missed KluckStock, don't miss the no-longer Mom to Mom sale on May 15.

Saucy Broad

Well folks, this is what you've all been waiting for -- the much anticipated reveal of my next fundraising projects!! They won't disappoint...

The first (and to me, most exciting) is that I am going to be the 2nd ever published author at Gut Check Press!! What the hey? Gut Check Press is Ted's newest (and most gutsy!) project yet, his very own publishing empire! He and partner-in-crime Zach Bartels are starting a up small publishing house of their own -- you can check it out at www.gutcheckpress.com it's pretty cool.

So, what does that have to do with me becoming a real live bona-fide author? I'm going to write a cookbook, entitled: Saucy Broad, A Culinary Manifesto of Hope -- and you, dear reader, will have the once-in-a-lifetime opportunity to buy it! Lots of you have told me that I should do a cookbook, or at least a collection of my recipes, and I've never really thought that the effort it would take to do this would be worth it -- I mean, come on, how many of these would I really sell? It's not like I'm famous or anything! And it's not like my recipes are all 100% original material -- almost all of them I got somewhere, and maybe tweaked a little. But then Bethany Erhlich was nudging me to do it, and she suggested I self-publish (which removes the huge hassle of trying to convince a publishing company that I could sell more than 15). And right as she was telling me about this, I remembered that Ted's setting up his own press -- he could publish it!
So we're going to do a print-on-demand thing, which means there is little overhead in set-up costs, and they print them as they are ordered (so if only 15 get ordered, there won't be another 985 sitting in a warehouse somewhere collecting dust.) Bethany also suggested I do this as an adoption fundraiser -- which actually made sense to me on the motivation level. So I've actually started it (shocking, I know) and have a good bit done already! I'm hoping it will be ready to hit the presses by Memorial Day maybe? (Ok, even typing that sort of freaks me out. Wow, that's ambitious). Folks will be able to order it maybe here, or for sure on the Gut Check Press website, and all the proceeds will go towards our adoptions (and since we're self publishing, that will be a lot bigger of a percentage than if there was a Big House publisher foolish enough to take this on.)

SO -- get excited, and start saving your pennies now, kiddos, because it's gonna be saucy -- just like me! All my recipes, all the fun little facts you'd learn from me if we were cooking together in the kitchen, plus some bonus fun essays (about food? cooking? maybe even about me! probably not, that'd be lame) from none other than world-famous author Ted Kluck! It will basically be just like having Ted and I over every single night, only you don't have to feed us, and as soon as you're tired of us you can close the book.

Onto other fundraising news: I am almost 100% sure that I am going to move forward with this mom2mom sale idea. I've begun the process of reserving the venue for the date (I'll reveal that as soon as it's confirmed.) So you can start setting aside all that sweet stuff that you don't need anymore but that other people will be dying to buy. And start thinking of ways to help me advertise this thing, 'cause I don't have a clue. And planning to come weekend of, for some good times whilst we organize, tag, and sell sell sell! Should be fun!

 

KluckStock 2010!!

As I, Kristin, make my re-entry back into the world of blogging, I thought I would start off with a bang – and tell you all about Kluckstock!

Kluckstock was the kickoff of our adoption fundraising efforts – a little party we hosted at our church (URC) to tell people about our plans and needs. It was also, incidentally, super fun! We had a boatload of desserts (all homemade by me, and a group of friends – I figure we logged about 48 man-hours last week baking. But boy, what fun!) karaoke, a sweet silent auction, trivial pursuit, and a kids movie! There were lots of folks there (estimates range from 70 – 200)and it looked like everyone was having a great time – we sure did! It was pretty amazing to look around the room and realize that lots of people who are dear to us (it was mostly people from church, but there were several who came to a strange church just for the purpose of supporting us, which was awesome!) took time out of their busy schedules to come hear us talk, give us money, and have a good time. It was even more amazing to see lots of people we didn’t know who came for the same reasons! I was humbled to see lots of college students there too – students who are a lot more mature and selfless than I was when I was a student!

There were tons of people who helped us pull this whole thing off. Trisha and Amie did lots of work getting the silent auction stuff together – which was a huge hit! And a huge amount of work to do, I’m afraid, but I wouldn’t know because I just left it in their capable hands, showed up, and there it was… beautiful! I had lots and lots of kitchen helpers, baking the yummy delicacies we all enjoyed: Heidi, Danielle, Priscilla, Katherine, Steph, Amie, Booty, Margie, Megan and Jami – thanks so much! I think I has as much fun baking as I did at Kluckstock! A big shout out goes to Sherre (facility manager at URC, and Evan and Cheese who undoubtably had more stuff to clean because of us) and the diaconate for letting us take over the building on Friday. Thanks to the DeLeons who let us use their karaoke equipment, that really made some memories! To the unsung heroes, those who took care of kids so the rest of us could have fun, thanks so much! The singing heroes deserve some props too, for getting up there and putting it all on the line -- most notably Carissa, who endured so much razzing beforehand. Your performance was worth the wait! Then there were those who helped us set up and clean up – most notably our beloved Scottie, who stayed with us to the very end. But maybe that was just because he had nothing else to do. And then, there were lots and lots of donations, both items for the silent auction and those who bought the items and just flat out gave us money – thank you thank you thank you!

So you want to hear the best part? Ok, this is pretty amazing, so get ready. We had a bill sitting on my desk from our agency for the remaining agency fee for $7,100. The fundraiser brought in $7,240. Coincidence? I don’t think so! I am so encouraged and thankful to see this tangible evidence of support from the body and God’s ability to provide.

What's next, you may ask. Financially, we still have a long ways to go. Our next big expense (we won't count paperwork and medical exams as "big") will be to buy our plane tickets, and have $20,000 in cash to take with us whenever it is we leave for Ukraine. And there is the little thing of needing a bigger car when we get home, one that will actually fit 3 boosters/carseats (this means a minivan, folks, read it and weep Ted!) So we will be applying for grants and looking for all sorts of ways to make money in the next few months -- more on that in my next post.

Paperwork wise, we've still got the lion's share to do: medical reports & labs, police reports, income documentation (this one's especially fun), FBI fingerprinting, birth & marriage certs, and the dreaded immigration papers. Sometimes I feel like completing the dossier is like having a full time job -- only it's a job I pay for instead of getting paid for!

A big thank you, everyone who made KluckStock so awesome, and thank you readers for caring about this long and torturous process -- and caring about our family! Stayed tuned, I'll be posting weekly...

Mission Accomplished (The Great Return)

After our last post, I sort of figured anything else I would have to say would be a bit of an anti-climax. But then I started thinking about all of you who have followed this blog from places outside Lansing (including our new, but dear, friends in Ukraine) who might be wondering if we got home safely and how it's going over on this side of the pond... so then I thought I would just wait until we had a great new family picture that made me look hot... and realized if I waited to post a blog until I had that it really would be forever!

So, with no further ado, here are some pictures of us happily at home. My mom did a little Easter egg hunt for the boys. As you can see, Maxim caught on very quickly to the concept, and was even more delighted when he realized there was candy inside! He has also been soaking up the love -- notice the big happy smile between 2 loving grandmas (my mom is in white, Ted's mom is in brown). Oh, and it's been comfirmed several times over that Maxim is indeed much cuter in real life even than in the pictures.

Tristan has already been back to school, where he was the star of the show. Absolutely everyone, teachers and kids alike, had lots of questions for him and were happy to see him back, where he in turn basked in the attention. Maxim made a brief cameo at the end of the school day, so all the kids could gawk and admire. A special shout-out to Mrs. Promer and Mrs. Boyd, who really are the sweetest, most understanding, supportive and loving teachers ever -- they welcomed all of us back with open arms and helped Tris transition back into school like he had never been gone.

The trip back was overall pretty uneventful. In retrospect, the boys did amazingly well (although there were a few times, mid-flight, that I thought -- we are not going to make it! Those of you -- Jen L -- who have flown that far with little kids understand.) Ted did well too -- only a few worry-wart meltdowns, wondering if we were going to get on the flight, get through customs, make our connection, etc. However, I firmly believe it was his insistence on getting us to each gate as early as humanly possible, and even the very worrying itself, that was responsible for getting us home safe and sound. That, and possibly God's faithfulness.

It has been so wonderfully good to be home! Everything here is so dear and familiar, yet new again. (I've had trouble remembering where I keep a few things! weird) The highlights have been our own dark, quiet bedroom complete with comfy bed (and privacy)! My kitchen (although I haven't used it much yet, as Ted's mom loves to take us out to eat. We don't protest.) with it's automatic ice maker, dishwasher, and many culinary tools! The great food we've been eating! Separate beds for the boys! A closet full of different clothes and shoes (hooray for flip-flop season!!)! Cars we can drive to destinations we are familiar with! Washer and dryer and clean-smelling clothes! But most of all, it has been so good to be back with those we love -- knowing that we'll soon see all the people we've missed so much, who have been so supportive in holding us up in prayer. We are eager to get back in touch with everyone, show Maxim off to everyone, and just generally get back into the swing of things! It may take us a while to get around to everything we want to do and everyone we want to see (jet lag really is a bummer) but know we are eager to see all of you.

Thanks again for laboring through this with us. Thanks for commenting, and making me feel important. Thanks for your prayers and concern for our family. What a trip it's all been!

Love,

Kristin (mom of 2 :)

Going the Distance

You're welcome, those of you who have requested more cute pictures :) Really, it was hard to narrow it down to these 4, the boys are so incredibly photogenic. And for all you football fans out there, please notice Maxim studying intently for the upcoming draft -- yup, that's one of Ted's draft mags he's using to pass the time on the pot!

So now, let me tell you all the terrifyingly thrilling news: Maxim has a baby sister. Her name is Anastasia, she's one year old (as of November) and she lives in the same orphanage he did. Because we have adopted her biological brother, we get preference to adopt her -- only a biological relative of hers could "trump" our claim to her; no other foreigners, or even Ukrainians, can adopt her if we wish to. We've already begun the process that will allow us to return in about a year and a half to adopt her, Lord willing. It's funny, when we came over here, we prayed that God would give us contentment with the referral for the child He would give us, regardless of their gender, even though we all really wanted a little girl. And Maxim is so amazing, we love him dearly for the sweet person he is in and of himself -- but he is also the link to the little girl we've always wanted. We wouldn't have dreamed of trying to do another adoption, but we feel compelled to try for this little girl, Maxim's sister, and feel God has graciously given us this blessing. We can't even begin to express the excitement, hope, and fears we are experiencing due to this wholly unexpected opportunity. I've cut a little section out of Ted's epilogue from the upcoming adoption book:

The idea of coming back here both freaks me out and thrills me. This trip has been, in many ways, easier than the first. The adoption was smoother, and one would expect, it will be again with little Anastasia because the first step (her referral) is out of the way. In other ways it’s been tougher, mainly due to the fact that we’ve grown soft and spoiled by our suburban lives. I miss my comfy couch. My bed. My playstation. My carpet.

The potential challenges in Anastasia’s adoption are many, namely, cost. We’ve gone into a significant amount of debt – but do-able debt – to get the boys, and hadn’t planned on adding a third $40,000 adoption into our budget. But when we were asked about Anastasia, we said “yes” after praying about it for a night. The Lord has provided for all of our needs, financially, even through some very lean writing years, and we know he’ll be faithful to supply our needs in her case. But for the first time since a one-year stint as Campus Crusade missionaries a decade ago, we’ll be raising money. This freaks us out, to say the least, namely because we just don’t like asking people for things, but also because there were things about it (fundraising) that didn’t sit well the first time. We’re trusting God to smooth over the rough edges in this area.

Also scary is the fact that she’ll be without us, in an orphanage, for at least another year. Please pray for her health, safety, and spiritual development during that year. We’re sad to not be able to experience that year with her, but sadder still that it will be a year before we can begin to tell her the good news of Jesus Christ.

So there it is, in a nutshell (or bombshell.) What started out to be the end of our adoptions is actually the beginning of another -- assuming many, many things work in our favor. There is a lot of uncertainty, still, the greatest of which is how on earth we are going to come up with this kind of money, again. Plus, it's terrifying to think that somehow it won't work out - her biological mother will come back, or she'll just disappear somehow between now and then. So sharing this is a significant emotional step. It's hard to make public something so uncertain.

We've got several showers and parties on the horizon once we return to Lansing, and some of those, I suppose, will include the option to contribute to Anastasia's adoption in lieu of a gift. So celebrate Maxim with us (he's a miracle, in and of himself!), and pray about Anastasia with us. This has been a wild ride, and we thank you for being a part of it.

We hope to see you all soon!

love, Kristin